On the evening of April 1, 2007 we received a phone call from Shari Hedrick at Worlds Together (our adoption agency) informing us that the American pediatrician who examined Ellie at the orphanage in China was concerned about what he saw, and that we should be aware that her condition could prove to be the result of poor nutrition and "failure to thrive" syndrome, or could be due to something more serious (such as Cerebral Palsy), but that we wouldn't likely know until AFTER we take her. Mentally, she appeared to the doctor to be on target. However, they wanted to give us a chance to think and pray about whether we are willing to take a "special needs" child or not. They made it clear that there are other couples who have requested "special needs" children and that she would definititely go to one of them if we believe that we cannot take her. We would also only have to wait a few weeks before we could take another referral.

After talking together and with the children, we prayed and asked the Lord to speak to us. Since last night, we believe that the Lord may have been speaking to us in a few different ways. Of course, we may be wrong. And if we are, we ask Him to reveal that to us as well. The following ways He seems to be confirming for us that we should move ahead with bringing Ellie into our family include...

1. Last night, Vicki saw a familiar verse from Isaiah 43 on a website that struck her, but especially the first part which is usually not noticed or included when the verse is quoted, "Do not be afraid, for I am with you; I will bring your children from the east and gather you from the west. I will say to the north, "Give them up!"

And to the south, "Do not hold them back." Bring my sons from afar and my daughters from the ends of the earth..." (Vicki)--though I had seen this verse repeatedly throughout our adoption process, the part that always spoke to me was the "promise" part of the verse- "I will bring your children..." Last night when I saw this verse, the part that jumped out at me was DO NOT BE AFRAID.

2. Vicki woke up in the night and tearfully said to the Lord, "I don't know if I can give her what she needs." What she believes was the Lord's voice immediately replied with, "But I can give you what you need" (which she interpreted as: grace and wisdom to give Ellie what she needs.)

3. This morning I tried to listen to two different sermons online that just wouldn't work for some reason. The third one I tried worked, and was called "Great Expectations" by Kim Engleman, one of the teaching pastors at Menlo Park Presbyterian Church. It was so very relevant to our situation. I was struck hard by both the timing of the message (it is from yesterday) and the topic about aligning our expectations with God's and how He often does not do what we expect because what He is doing is BETTER even if it initially SEEMS worse, etc., etc. Vicki listened to it after I did and also strongly sensed that it was the Lord speaking to us.

You can listen to it too at: 

http://mppc.org/learn/series/sermons/great-expectations


4. My devotional reading for this morning was from a book called "Out of the Ordinary" by David Roper and there were a number of things from it that seemed to leap off the pages and speak to us, including: "MY presence will go with you..." (Exodus 33:14); "Nor did He promise Moses that he would enjoy a carefree life of affluence and ease. He only promised to be with His servant and make him a center of peace in the midst of the confusion and uncertainty of his day. GOD WILL DO THE SAME FOR YOU. He does not promise that you will enjoy a tranquil trouble-free existence...but He does utter the simple promise, 'My presence will go with you, and I will give you rest.' " And then it ended with this poem...

God hath not promised skies always blue,
Flower-strewn pathways all our lives through;
God hath not promised sun without rain,
Joy without sorrow, peace without pain.

But God hath promised strength for the day,
Rest for the labor, light for the way,
Grace for the trials, help from above,
Unfailing sympathy, undying love.

God hath not promised, we shall not know
Toil and temptation, trouble and woe;
He hath not told us we shall not bear
Many a burden, many a care.

But God hath promised strength for the day,
Rest for the labor, light for the way,
Grace for the trials, help from above,
Unfailing sympathy, undying love.

God hath not promised smooth roads and wide,
Swift, easy travel, needing no guide;
Never a mountain, rocky and steep,
Never a river turbid and deep.

But God hath promised strength for the day,
Rest for the labor, light for the way,
Grace for the trials, help from above,
Unfailing sympathy, undying love.
--Annie Johnson Flint

5. When we suggested to the kids that we should spend some more time "waiting and listening" to give God a chance to speak, Cody said, "We've already given Him 6 years!" and what he said really resonated in our spirits as true.

6. When we think about the possibility of Ellie needing total care in the future (when Vicki and I may not be around to provide it), we cannot think of persons better able (character-wise) to provide it than our other kids.

7. Reflecting this morning on my desire for Ellie's middle name to be "Ming Yun" (Destiny), I was STRONGLY struck with how it REALLY is her destiny, and ours, for her to be a part of our family.

8. Reflecting on how it is our CHOICE whether to accept her or not (with or without health problems), I was reminded of David's CHOICE to "adopt" Mephibosheth (a "special needs" orphan), and was also reminded that there are plenty of biological babies born with health problems into families who "cannot financially or logistically meet those challenges" but somehow they do. God could have matched us with any other orphan, but SHE IS THE ONE He chose. How could we choose otherwise? We may have been taken by surprise but He was not.

9. In reading through Proverbs 3 today, verse 27 jumped out at me. (Vicki) "Do not withhold good from those who deserve it, when it is in your power to act."